“Let God Write Your Love Story” - Masturbation/Pornography

What is masturbation? 

Erotic stimulation of one's own genital organs, usually to achieve orgasm.

It is estimated that 80-85% of teenage boys and 40 percent of teenage girls masturbate.

I know that statistically more guys struggle with this than girls, but the devil has caused the church to think that no one struggles with this.

Does the Bible mention masturbation?

No. The word “masturbation” never appears in scripture. The Bible never addresses this topic by word.

Though there is not a verse that says, “Thou Shall Not Masturbate!” Keep something in mind…in order to masturbate you have to LUST…and the Bible has a lot to say about LUST!

The simple definition of lust is having a self-absorbed desire for an object, person, or experience. When we are in lust, we place the object of our desire above all things in our lives. 

"But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (Matthew 5:28 NKJV)

Can a person masturbate without thinking about someone of the opposite sex in a sexual way? 

I am not sure that is possible, but when a person masturbates they are basically having sex with them self…there is no way around that. It is a self serving action that allows you to be “god” of your universe, totally controlling what you think about and how you feel. 

My opinion of those topics that the Bible doesn’t come out and address by word is that God has given us wisdom and conviction. We should use those two operating in out lives through direction of the Holy Ghost to lead our lives. 

If you could sing “Amazing Grace” and do it then it would probably be ok…but that I just didn’t think that was possible considering what must take place in the mind for masturbation to happen.

"Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told  you  in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those  who are  Christs have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another."(Galatians 5:19-26 NKJV)

"For all that  is  in the world the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of lifeis not of the Father but is of the world." (1 John 2:16 NKJV)

What about mutual masturbation?

a couple masturbating together or stimulating each other until each reach orgasm. 

61% of teens (13-19) have been involved with mutual masturbation.

73% of teens (13-19) do not believe that mutual masturbation or oral sex are considered “having sex.”

What about married people? Is it wrong to masturbate if they are thinking about their spouse? Why would you want to, marriage is the only boundaries in which a person can have sex under God’s guidelines. If you do that without your spouse you are either thinking about them or someone else. We have already covered if you think about someone else. If you think about your spouse then your USING them for YOUR self satisfaction…and, if you love them so much…why would you do this to them? 

How you date will be how you will marry. If you break up after every little thing you will probably do that in marriage. That is why dating is not a good idea. DATING DOES NOT PREPARE YOU FOR MARRIAGE IT PREPARES YOU FOR DIVORCE!

A Healthy sex life in marriage takes WORK from both husband and wife – but the husband must take the lead in creating an environment of romance in the home. A married man who masturbates is doing nothing more than taking the easy way out…he’s not willing to love and serve his wife…but he uses images of his wife in his mind to serve himself…this is nothing more than self worship–the Bible calls this idolatry. We know God’s view of idolatry. 

I know some of you are feeling sick right now, but, as a youth pastor, I am tired of the church being silent about issues that 99% of men and around 50% of women deal with for the sake of “not offending anyone.” Masturbation IS a big deal…and it ruins God’s design of sex and intimacy…it ruins how God desired for women to be viewed…it tears apart marriages and families…and it controls some men to a point of obsession.

STUDENTS, DONT SET YOURSELF UP FOR FAILURE IN YOUR MARRIAGE BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO DIE TO YOUR OWN SELFISH DESIRES WHILE SINGLE. 

If you cant deny your self as a single what makes you think you can do it in marriage. What is a person to do when masturbation gets boring and they cant just get excited any more? Most turn to visual stimulations (pornography). What happens when the visual stimulation is not exciting anymore?

This mindset prepares you for failure in marriage. What happens when your spouse isn’t exciting anymore or isn’t doing what you want. You always did what you wanted when you were dating and never died to yourself. What makes you think you can do it once you are married and you wont run off and find someone else. 

What would I say to a man or women who has this problem? STOP IT would be the first thing!!! 95% of the time pornography is linked to masturbation. 

Then ask for accountability.

"For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one should take advantage of and defraud his brother in this matter, because the Lord  is  the avenger of all such, as we also forewarned you and testified. For God did not call us to uncleanness, but in holiness."  (1 Thessalonians 4:3-7 NKJV)

Porneia  - the Greek word meaning sexual immorality. Its the word we get our word pornography from. 

Ask God to help you to develop a healthy view of marriage and the opposite sex. That girl (woman) is some mans daughter. That boy (man) is some womans son. I promise you you will not want someone looking at your son or daughter that way , but treated with respect. 

Deny your self. That is the first step to overcoming the enemy and having victory over sin!!

Demonic Spirits that Attack the Church part 1

Jezebel's was the daughter of Ethbaal (1 Kings 16: 31) which means, “towards Baal”. She was raised in worship of Baal. 

Baal worship  is counterfeit worship of Jesus. 

Baal – lord or to take lordship. Worship of yourself where you are right about everything and you cant live under authority.

Jezebel – unhusbanded though she was married she was in control. Baal worship was very sexual.

Worship of Baal was very sexual so when you see this spirit behind it sexual sin.

Jezebel married king Ahab who was suppose to be king over Gods people. Their marriage was a treaty.

It was a sin that they married in marrying her he brought an illegitimate authority in to the kingdom. 1 Kings 16:29-34

When you have illegitimate authority in leadership it lead to rebellion and the Bible says rebellion is like the sin of witchcraft.

Witchcraft is when anything but the legitimate authority is in control. 

When a husband doesn’t lead his family. When a pastor doesn’t lead a church. 

Paul said who has put witchcraft on you that you don’t obey they truth. 

The spirit of Jezebel has to always have control. This spirit can only manifest itself and thrive when there is an Ahab behind it that allows it to have control. As one as it is in control it will not cause a problem. 

Jezebel – known for several things:

1. Hated the prophets of God and sought to kill them so. 

By the time the prophet Elijah came on the scene there were only 7001 believers left in Israel. She had killed them. 7000 were hiding in caves. Only 1 had the boldness to come out and face her and his name was Elijah. 

When Elijah confronted them he told them they had come to take something they were not assigned to lead.

Godis look for Elijahs to stand up and confront this spirit in the church and 

1. Naboth’s vineyard. Good Jewish man who had inherited his land all through the years.  –  I Kings 21

Ahab wanted those vineyards. He tried to buy it and Naboth said he couldn’t sell it so Jezebel wrote unsigned letters telling lies and destroyed Naboth’s reputation, resulting in having Naboth killed.  God saw it and told Jezebel the dogs are going to lick her blood and eat her body.

I Kings 21:17-24

Fulfilled – Ahab – I Kings 22:37-38

         Jezebel – II Kings 9:30-37 

Naboth’s vineyard is a picture of the church. 

Naboth means “fruit not quite ripe”.  

Jezebel wants to come and steal from you before you reach the destiny that God has for you. 

Revelation 2:20

Not the same flesh and blood but the same spirit to stop what God wants to do. 

She wants to control until she destroys everything that God wants to do. 

She always wants to have control. 

You have to have a spirit of Ahab in leadership that will allow Jezebel to have control. 

In the early church the church was the body of Christ. The pastor was like the head of the body. For a person to come against the pastor or their leader would be like slapping yourself in the face. 

If you raise a hand against an authority that God has placed in your life it opens a door for this spirit to control you. 

Elijah will confront this spirit. 

Jehu will finish the job!

2 Kings 2:9-37

How she works:

She always uses manipulation to get what she wants. This spirit will never be straight forward. There is alway a hidden agenda. It likes to control from secret. That is why there has to be an Ahab for this spirit to control. 

Notice, she wrote letters and wasn't even woman enough to sign her name to them. She signed Ahab's name. This is the spirit that propels people to send "anonymous" letters to people. 

1. She works through temper tantrums. He wants you to get upset and pitch a fit.
2. She works through bad moods. Your countenance testifies against you.  Some of you can paralyze the man that is trying to preach with the looks on your face.
3. She works through passive aggressive behavior. 
4. She works through codependences. She depends more on another person than she does on God.
5. She will always lead to immorality. 
6. She will hates true ministers.

This spirit kills.

Her purpose is to control until you lose the will to go on.

This spirit seeks to attack the leader.

After the mess is made you cant fine it. 

Those in leadership must rebuke the Ahab spirit and cling to the Elijah spirit.

When the spirit of Jezebel begins to manifest itself in the church, it will seek someone who thinks they should have more power than they have and stir up a spirit of dominance in that person. 

The spirit of Jezebel is very focused on what she wants and will do whatever she can to get it, include hurt people. 

This spirit will look and act spiritual but is very deceptive. 

This spirit doesn't just attach itself to women. Men are very much influenced by this spirit. 

WE MUST CONFRONT AND BIND THESE SPIRITS. IF THE BELIEVER WILL CONFRONT AND BIND THIS SPIRIT AS WELL AS ANY OTHER DEMONIC SPIRIT OTHERS WILL TAKE NOTE AND WILL NOT CAUSE PROBLEMS.  1 Timothy 5:20 

Remember, We are not wrestling against each other. This is demonic warfare and must be fought in the spiritual realm not in the flesh. If you fight this battle in the flesh you will be defeated. 

Walk in victory through the Cross. 

Are These Thoughts Natural

I know this is a very passionate for almost everyone, but please know that as you read my notes that THERE IS GRACE. It is ok to be wrong but it is not ok to stay wrong. I know that people will see the church as intolerant haters and narrow minded. We are suppose to be narrow minded. Thats the way to get to Heaven, the narrow road. The road to get to hell is broad. We can not expect people that do not use the Bible as an authority in their lives to understand this message of homosexuality as a sin. 

God created man’s sexual part to be used with his wife’s sexual parts. Man has misused it and woman has misused it and many have tried to recreate what God created or believe God made a mistake and they try to change their gender to be what they thought they should be.

74% of male homosexuals had more than 50 partners in lifetime (the average heterosexual adult has 8 partners in a lifetime)

80% at any given time are affected by an sexually transmitted disease.

In a report on drug use for Newsweek magazine, it was found that…

89% of homosexuals had used marijuana 

over 50% had used cocaine or LSD 

42% had experienced depression because of there drug use

which led to 35% considering suicide, 18% attempting it.

48% of teens that commit suicide admitted before or were found to have struggled with homosexuality.

                                                                                                                              

What is homosexuality?

Homosexuality is the manifestation of sexual desire toward a member of one's own sex or the erotic activity with a member of the same sex. (The Greek word homos means the same). A lesbian is a female homosexual. More recently the term "gay" has come into popular use to refer to both sexes who are homosexuals.

What does the Bible teach about homosexuality?

First, there is adultery. Adultery in the natural sense is sexual intercourse of a married person with someone other than his or her own spouse. It is condemned in both the Old and New Testaments (Exodus 20:14; I Cor. 6:9, 10). Christ forbids dwelling upon the thoughts, the free play of one's imagination that leads to adultery (Matthew 5:28).

Then there is homosexuality which likewise is condemned in Scripture. The Apostle Paul, writing by inspiration of the Holy Spirit, declares that homosexuality "shall not inherit the kingdom of God" (I Corinthians 6:9; 10). Now Paul does not single out the homosexual as a special offender. He includes fornicators, idolators, adulterers, thieves, covetous persons, drunkards, revilers and extortioners. And then he adds the comment that some of the Christians at Corinth had been delivered from these very practices: "And such were some of you: But ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the spirit of our God" (I Corinthians 6:11). All of the sins mentioned in this passage are condemned by God, but just as there was hope in Christ for the Corinthians, so is there hope for all of us.

Homosexuality is an illicit lust forbidden by God. He said to His people Israel, "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination" (Leviticus 18:22). "If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them" (Leviticus 20:13). In these passages homosexuality is condemned as a prime example of sin, a sexual perversion. The Christian can neither alter God's viewpoint nor depart from it.

In the Bible sodomy is a synonym for homosexuality. God spoke plainly on the matter when He said, "There shall be no whore of the daughters of Israel, nor a sodomite of the sons of Israel" (Deuteronomy 23:17). The whore and the sodomite are in the same category. A sodomite was not an inhabitant of Sodom nor a descendant of an inhabitant of Sodom, but a man who had given himself to homosexuality, the perverted and unnatural vice for which Sodom was known. Let us look at the passages in question:

But before they lay down, the men of the city, even the men of Sodom, compassed the house around, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:

And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where are the men which came in to thee this night? Bring them out unto us, that we may know them.

And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him, And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly.

Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as is good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof. (Genesis 19:4-8)

The Hebrew word for "know" in verse 5 is yada`, a sexual term. It is used frequently to denote sexual intercourse (Genesis 4:1, 17, 25; Matthew 1:24, 25). The message in the context of Genesis 19 is clear. Lot pled with the men to "do not so wickedly." Homosexuality is wickedness and must be recognized as such else there is nohope for the homosexual who is asking for help to be extricated from his perverted way of life.

Romans 1:24-27; I Timothy 1:10 and Jude 7. If one takes these Scriptures seriously, homosexualitywill be recognized as an evil. The Romans passage is unmistakably clear. Paul attributes the moral depravity of men and women to their rejection of "the truth of God" (1:25). They refused "to retain God in their knowledge" (1:28), thereby dethroning God and deifying themselves. The Old Testament had clearly condemned homosexuality but in Paul's day there were those persons who rejected its teaching. Because of their rejection of God's commands He punished their sin by delivering them over to it.

The philosophy of substituting God's Word with one's own reasoning commenced with Satan. He introduced it at the outset of the human race by suggesting to Eve that she ignore God's orders, assuring her that in so doing she would become like God with the power to discern good and evil (Genesis 3:1-5). That was Satan's big lie. Paul said that when any person rejects God's truth, his mind becomes "reprobate," meaning perverted, void of sound judgment. The perverted mind, having rejected God's truth, is not capable of discerning good and evil.

In Romans 1:26-31 twenty-three punishable sins are listed with homosexuality leading the list. Paul wrote, "For this cause God gave them up into vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompense of their error which was meet" (Romans 1:26, 27). These verses are telling us that homosexuals suffer in their body and personality the inevitable consequences of their wrong doing. Notice that the behaviour of the homosexual is described as a "vile affection" (1:26). The Greek word translated "vile" (atimia) means filthy, dirty, evil, dishonourable. The word "affection" in Greek is pathos, used by the Greeks of either a good or bad desire. Here in the context of Romans it is used in a bad sense. The "vile affection" is a degrading passion, a shameful lust. Both the desire (lusting after) and the act of homosexuality are condemned in the Bible as sin

Several truth about this topic that the Christian has to be firm on:

1. Homosexuality is not natural.

2. God does not make people this way. Though we are all born into sin, we are not born homosexual. 

It is a choice we make!

3. God views this sin just like He does any other sin. Fully forgivable. 

4. God convicts and satan condemns. the stance of the Christian is to love homosexuals and to pray for them. Our message must be a balance of grace and truth. Grace that God will forgive but truth that God has not changed His mind on this topic. 

A New Level of Spiritual Warfare

In 2006 I visited Belize on a mission trip with about 30 other people. During that time of my life I had been asking God to anoint me to minister in a new realm and to understand more about spiritual warfare and to minister more in a prophetic realm. While on the trip to Belize I was sharing with the missionary my desire. During one of our rides back to the hotel the missionary called me to the front of the bus and laid hands on me. I felt a fresh anointing of fire flow through my body that night and God began to reveal new levels of anointing to me. 

Five years later I am seeing the things that I was begging God for to manifest themselves in my life. God has been and is opening up a realm of warfare to me that I have never known before. I believe that as we get closer to the return of Jesus the Christian will be forced to prepare for a fight that most of us don't want to recognized. The enemy is going to raise his head up more and more in our churches and around the body of Christian. We must prepare, kindda like a spiritual boot camp. 

There are a few things we must do in order to be equipped to fight this fight.

1. We must submit to spiritual authority. 

    

A solider that cannot take orders even when he doesn't like them will never survive and will risk his life as well as those around him.  Psalm 18:27 says, "For You will save the humble people, but will bring down haughty looks."

Anointing flows down. Anyone that tries to do their own thing and will not submit to authority will alway expose themselves to the enemy. 

2. Get on fire and stay on fire. 

You will always fight for what you are passionate about. When you stay in relationship with the Father and are seeking Him you will fall in love with Him and will seek to fight for Him. If you are in love with Him you will always fight this fight. 

"For You will light my lamp." Psalm 18:28 

3. Discipline - so many Christians in our generation lack discipline. Few want to prepare their selves and want to go through the sacrifice to train and prepare. God wants Christians who know when to say "no".

4. Have faith that God has already given you the victory. Psalm 18:29 says, "For by you I can run against a troop, by my God I can leap over a wall." 

Our faith must be in the Cross and what Jesus did there. Satan was defeated there. The battle we fight is not against people (flesh and blood) but we fight against the devil and all of his demons. Any time we try to fight this battle in the flesh we will be defeated. We must fight this battle with the spirit because we know that in the spirit the Cross will always give us victory. 

5. We don't have to fight empty handed. 

Psalm 18:30-32, 34 says, "As for God, His way is perfect;

The word of the LORD is proven; He is a shield to all who trust in Him. 31 For who is God, except the LORD? And who is a rock, except our God? 32 It is God who arms me with strength, And makes my way perfect. 33 He makes my feet like the feet of deer, And sets me on my high places. 34 He teaches my hands to make war, So that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

God has already written out the battle plan and we know that no matter what the enemy doe we have already won. 

6. Always be moving forward. Any solider that is not gain ground is loosing ground. The enemy is always trying to advance. The church has spent the last several decades defending itself. The gospel does not to be defended. Move forward, advance. Be offensive. The Gospel is offensive. 

Get ready church. We are at war. You are in the arm. You must fight. How you fight depends on which side you are on. Lets go to war!!!!!

Our Nine Year Anniversary

Today Natalie and I celebrate 9 years of marriage. What an incredible journey this has been so far. There has been alot that has happened in the last nine years. I have learned so much during this time and even though many of the lessons have been difficult to learn I am thankful for everything that God has taught me about myself, Natalie and His grace. Here are 10 things that God has taught me over the last nine years.

1. Marriage takes work. It is easier to obtain than it is to maintain. Anyone can get married but it takes two people totally committed to maintain a healthy marriage.

2. Marriage is a covenant between two people that is based on commitment NOT feelings.

3. Natalie is the most nourishing person I know. Maybe this is an instinct that all mothers have but I have seen her commitment to loving and protecting our kids and I know that I am blessed. She stayed in the hospital for a week or longer with Caleb without leaving the room several times last year to take care of him.

4. Natalie is truly my helpmate. Ministry is tough and I could not imagine doing it alone or without her support. There are times that I get called away late at night and don't get home when I am suppose to and even though it is never a convenient time she is always understanding of my job and what God has called us to do.

5. Natalie has an incredible attitude about her disability. As most of you know Natalie has a disorder called POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome). Many of the issues that this causes her are seldom seen. She lost her licenses about a year and a half ago, there are nights that she has severe chest pains and her heart races to very high rates and the heat is very difficult on her. Yet, through all of this she maintains a great attitude about life and our family.

6. Time flies!! It seems like yesterday that we found out that Natalie was pregnant with Gabriel. It was over 6 years ago. He will be finishing kindergarten next Friday. Where has time gone? I am still learning how precious theses moments are. I love to sit in the rocking chair and hold one of the kids until they fall asleep. Priceless Moments!!!

7. God's Grace is absolutely stronger than anything that any marriage can face. Many couples get to those points where they wander what they ever liked about each other and why they fell in love in the first place. Natalie and I have faced very difficult situations in nine years and I could tell you that without Jesus Christ being the center of our relationship there are times I am not sure we would have made it, but because we both understand God's Grace and allow the Holy Spirit to make us who He wants us to be He has drawn us closer to Jesus and in doing so we have drawn closer to each other.

8. With three kids it is IMPOSSIBLE to keep a house clean, let alone spotless. I have a confession, I am OCD. Most of you knew that already. I cant stand the house to be out of place. It is so bad that when I vacuum my vacuum marks have to be in line. I know I need prayer, but I have determined that with three kids the house isn't going to be spotless. I said I have determined this not that I have come to accept that. Gabriel and Caleb can build tents, hide outs, tunnels, cities, farms, etc any where and the house can be turned upside down in 3.2 seconds, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

9. I have a huge responsibility to lead my family spiritually. God is really stretching me in this area right now. Our family prayer time at night is the highlight of my day. I love to hear Gabriel quote scripture and Caleb to talk about Jesus coming back to take us home.

10. Having a little girl is so much different than having boys. I want Gabriel and Caleb to be tough, so when they fall down or hurt something, we make sure it is not broken, then we try to get them to suck it up and move on. I pray every night that God will make them Godly men and will use them and I know that He will. I need them to help me protect Rylee because she will not date until she is 40. NO JOKE! Yea, everyone said it would happen and it has, she stole my heart and I will be prepared to go to prison if a little boy breaks her heart. jk. Maybe! I pray that God is leading another mom and dad to teach their children the way Natalie and I are teaching ours and that in God's perfect timing He will bring our children the mate that He has chosen for them. By the way parents, it is nver to early to pray this for your kids.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY NATALIE! I LOVE YOU, LOVE LIVING LIFE WITH YOU AND CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT THE NEXT NINE YEARS HOLD.

Memorial Day!

Most of us slept late today because we had the day off. Memorial Day to many is the unofficial beginning of summer, but do you really understand the meaning of Memorial Day. Memorial Day is the day that we as a nations have set aside to remember those who have died serving our nation and defending our freedom. I am a patriotic person, I love America and I make it a point to thank those that I see in public in uniform, but I have never fought one second for the freedom of this nation, however, I do feel obligated to honor those who have. Several years ago I was in the Dallas-Ft. Worth with Bishop Gary Burd, who by the way is finishing a two week bike ride across the country in Washington DC with several thousand bikers and war veterans. Gary, his wife, Carolyn and I met up for lunch at Chilis in the airport. There were maybe two or three dozen soliders in the restaurant and at the end of our meal Gary asked our waiter for all the bills for the soliders. That's right he took care of the meal for every single solider in the place. That made such an impression on me. Though I dont see myself buying meals for 30-35 soliders anytime soon I determined that day that I would not allow anyone in uniform to pass me by without thanking them for their service. What a small price to pay to thank someone who has offered their life to ensure that my family and I can be safe. I often think about Tommy Harris, a gentleman in our church when I was growing up who lost one of his legs in war. I remember as a teenager going to help Tommy do work in his yard and seeing his determination to move around his yard and do what he could with one leg, which often hurt him beyond belief. His attitude and personality was never one of pity or complaining but was always cheerful and joking. I think about the men and women who did not die in Vietnam but are currently dying as a result of the agent orange they were exposed to while there fighting for our freedom. These men and women as well as many others are deserving of our honor for their sacrifice.

Recently we took 48 people from our student ministry to Washington DC for a youth conference. While we were there we visited a number of monuments and landmarks, including Arlington National Cemetery. We all made the hike to the Tomb of the Unknown Solider. I had been there 19 years ago when I was in the 6th grade and had the opportunity to lay a wreath at the tomb. There was so much about this experience that I didnt remember. Experiencing the Tomb of the Unknown Solider as well as the changing of the guard is something that sticks with you forever. Several hundred people gathered that morning to watch something that happens every single day. What an incredible way to honor a solider that died fighting for our country yet for whatever reason was never reunited with their family.

Raising Godly Kids

One of my greatest responsibility here on earth is to lead my family. God has appointed me as the priest of my family. I have a fear that I will fail in this area. As a youth pastor I talk to parents all the time that have children that are far from the Lord and the parents will tell me that they have done all they can to try to raise their children right. They will often say, "We raised them in church." Our society has a misconception of church and its role in the family. For some reason many parents think that all they have to do is take their kids to church and everything will be ok.

As the priest of my family God has given me the responsibility to lead and protect my family. I have to teach them to pray and tell my kids who Jesus is. This is not the church's responsibility. The church's job in regards to the family is to compliment what parents should be doing at home, however, for so many families the church has had to take a role of compensating for what is NOT happening at home. I believe with all of my heart that the churches in America will never see revival until the fathers of the home see revival. As goes the father, so goes the family. As goes the family, so goes the church. As goes the church, so goes the nation. By the way I am not saying if you do everything right your children will automatically serve God. There are children that no matter what you do will chose to rebel. However, the Bible is clear that if you will be faithful in raising them according to the Word of God, they will come back to it.

I was at a conference earlier this year with about 900 other pastors and church leaders. One of the speakers asked for those that had children away from the Lord to stand. Over half of the pastors in the place stood to their feet. This broke my heart. During that night the Holy Spirit asked me this question,

"What are you doing to make sure your kids are spiritual giants?"

WOW!!

We have family prayer time at our house and every time we pray I ask God to use my children and to make them leaders.

I want them to be totally in love with Jesus and to totally understand who He is and what He did at the Cross.

I want them to live this life totally free from the bondage of sin.

I want them to experience the Holy Ghost Baptism at an early age and to seek to live in it on a daily basis.

I want God to fill them with the Fruits of the Spirit and each one to be evident in their lives.

- love
- joy
- peace
- patience
- kindness
- goodness
- faithfulness
- gentleness
- self-control

I want them to be students of the Word. Recently, we saw a young man that had piercing and tattoos all over his body and Gabriel asked about them. I explained to him that Jesus loves that person but we believe the Bible teaches against those things. I have the responsibility to teach my children the Word of God, but I also want them to study and know the Word of God so that they will not be deceived by the world and false teachings and at the same time see people and love people just like Jesus showed us.

There are also some questions that I think every parent should sit down and talk to their children about. I am blown away at the things that teenagers do and their parents never know about, yet if you ask the parents they will say they know everything their kids are doing. Parents can not expect their kids to just come and just start talking to them. It is the responsibility of the parent to initiate conversation with their kids. Here are some questions that I heard Andy Stanley share that I thought were very good for parents to ask their children. This may require mom and dad to swallow their pride. I hope they help.


-Is everything ok in your heart?

- Did anyone hurt your feelings today?

- Are you mad at anyone?

- Did anyone break a promise to you today?

- Is there anything I can do for you today?

Two things that have been very hard for me to do as a parent:

1. Because I am a minister and deal with negative situations often within the church and the fact that I am never "off-duty" it is very difficult for me to protect my children from hearing negative things about Natalie and I, others, our church and even the Kingdom of God. Though I cant always protect them from these things I strive to show them that my faith is in Jesus and not in people. People will fail us and we have to turn to Jesus and believe that He will have the final word.

2. I FAIL! So many times I fail as a husband, as a dad, as a pastor, as a Christian, etc. Life is tough and I want my children to know that though we fail we have to get back up. When we fall we have to get back up and run to the Cross. Daily I have to crucify myself and the sin nature that so often tries to get me down. I want them to understand that they can walk in victory.

An extra bonus:

Discipline: Parents that think their kids never do wrong get on my nerves. Listen, I am the first to defend my kids but I also know that they are kids ad mess up some times. If we don't discipline our kids we will do them a disservice and hurt them, NOT HELP THEM. You will not warp their personality by spanking them. But if you do, would you rather them be warped by your love and discipline or by the world.

May be this scripture will help!

"Do not withhold correction from a child, for if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod and deliver his soul from hell.". - Proverbs 23:13-14

Victory Over Sin

6 knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. 7 For he who has died has been freed from sin. 8 Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, 9 knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, dies no more. Death no longer has dominion over Him. 10 For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. Romans 6:6-10

The word "sin" is mentioned 17 times in Romans 6. 15 of those times it refers to the sin nature, the other two times it refers to an act of sin. We have to understand the difference in the sin nature and the act of sin.The main problem is the sin nature. Acts of sin are results of the sin nature. You don't smoke because you have cancer. You have cancer because you smoke!

He is helping you understand how you can stay free. He knows that God does not want His children to struggle with sin. He wants the believer to see that the "old man" that enjoyed the sin nautre is crucified and we should not allow him to exist any longer after we but our personal faith in Jesus Christ and what He did on the Cross.

18 We know that whoever is born of God does not sin; but he who has been born of God keeps himself, and the wicked one does not touch him. 1 John 5:18

The phrase "whoever is born of God does not sin" here means that the Christian does not practice sin. He is no longer to be bounded and controled by sin. It doesnt mean you are perfect and will never sin. You do not allow sin to control you and therefore no longer habitually sin.

We start out following God. We want to do the will of God and do what God has said to do, but the flesh starts to tell us that we can do it on our on.

Men and women are naturally tempted to look at someone of the opposite sex. Before marriage you can pursue that person in any capacity you wish. There is no commitment to anyone and therefore you have the freedom to look, talk, date, etc. After marriage those desires of thinking someone is attractive do not go away, but that old single person is dead and you can no longer allow those desires or temptations to have a place in your mind. If you give them place in your mind they will lead you away and destroy you. You are now committed to the person you entered a marriage convenant with. Temptations or desires towards anyone else will draw you away and destroy you and your relationship with the one you are in covenant with. This is true in our relationship with God. Anything that seperates you from Him is sin. As a child of God you are in a covenant relationship with Him and any temptation or desire that is not crucified at the Cross and is allowed to grow in your heart or mind will lead to sin and will destroy you.



12 Blessed is the man who endures temptation; for when he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. 13 Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. 14 But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. 15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death. James 1:12-15



7 steps in temptation

1. we are tempted - the thought of doing evil. at this point it is not a sin.(v.14)

Matthew 4:1-11 - temptation in and of itself is not a sin. Jesus was tempted and sinned not!!

2. we allow the temptation to draw us away - strong imagination.

3. we give place to lust - when we delight in viewing something (v.14)

4. we are enticed by the temptation - weakening of our will

5. we yield our body or mind to the temptation.

6. we act out what at this point has only been entertained in our mind and/or
heart.

7. the result of giving into the temptation will eventually lead to death
(spiritual and possibly physical death )


Christian That Lives A Life of Freedom

- FOCUS - JESUS CHRIST -

GOD DOESNT WANT YOUR FOCUS OR EYES TO BE ON ANYONE ELSE.



WHEN WE GET OUR EYES OFF OF JESUS WE WILL BEGIN TO GET OFF
OF TRACK


- OBJECT OF FAITH - THE CROSS - THE CROSS DOES NOT MOVE

WHEN WE PUT OUR FAITH IN ANYTHING ELSE IT WILL FAIL US.


- POWER SOURCE - THE HOLY SPIRIT - THE HOLY GHOST GIVES US THE POWER TO DO WHAT IS RIGHT.


- RESULTS - VICTORY


Christians That Live a Life of Defeat

- Focus - Works - what you can do.

- Object of Faith - Your Performance - How well you can do it.

- Power Source - Yourself

- Results - Defeat



Victory can only come from God through Jesus (John 14:6) and what He did on the Cross (Luke 9:23). We can only have that victory and freedom through self denial (Luke 9:23-24)